Why being cheated on is NEVER your fault

Being cheated on does not explain the person you are, it shows the person they are not.

I got off the phone this morning at 3:00am with a friend who found out they’d been cheated on. She called the delinquent to confront him and the girl whom he cheated on with chose to pick up the phone. C’mon girl. We’re supposed to be here to build each other up, not make each other cry and feel like we’re less than we are. Women have it tough enough. Let’s not willingly induce emotions like fear, anger, confusion and sadness in others. A wise women once said, “Real queens fix other’s crowns”.


Anyway, after finding out that her boyfriend cheated on her, she cried and self-blamed. She blamed herself for his actions.

“What did I do wrong?”

“I was all in. I gave him everything”

“Why am I never enough”

Oh girl, you did NOTHING wrong. What’s ironic, is sometimes in this world, we find that if you love someone more than they deserve, they will hurt you more than you deserve. More importantly, a real man or woman respects you when you’re not around. The cheating was not a reflection on what my friend did or did not do. My friend is TOO GOOD for this insecure boy. It’s not that she wasn’t good enough. What’s “good enough” even mean? This boy wasn’t the right one for my friend. But I will say, people who are happy with themselves, don’t intentionally hurt and deceive others. 

& there is nothing you can to do to prevent being cheated on.

Whomever tells you otherwise is not a good friend or role model.

In order to live fully, recover, and heal from the immense hurt of being cheated on is to remind yourself how great you are. Remind yourself that his/her actions are NOT a reflection on the person you are or ever will be. You can only control your actions. Don’t let him control anymore of your feelings, you’re too smart for insecure boys.

There is a huge amount of freedom that comes when you take nothing personally. -Don Miguel Ruiz

To my friend, an immature boy may tell you that you look pretty today and turn around and beguile you. I’ll tell you how beautiful you look everyday and I will always be here. The female bond is strong.

So, next time you’re feeling down on yourself, call me. I’ll be here just like I was at 3am on February 6th.

PS Screw throw away boys.


Comment your thoughts below. Thanks for reading 🙂

3 comments on “Why being cheated on is NEVER your fault

  1. You’re my daughter yes, but this is truth regardless…. you have a real talent addison. I hope you will explore it.


  2. Carolyn Thomas

    Loved your thoughts on “Why being cheated on…” An important thought I want to share is that men of character, wisdom and a good heart will never cheat. They may want to, they may think about it, but they have too much self-respect to be a cheating weasel. Find a good man and you will be able to trust him.


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